He Colored My World...

I am actually shaking as I type this because I am so nervous to do this.

But I need your advice.  All of you who read this. Yes, YOU!  And I just reached over 200 followers (Yay!  How fun because I am grateful for every one of you) and what better time to re-introduce you to my special story.  But I have to tell you that I am so fearful of failure that it can sometimes paralyze me.  And I have toyed around with an idea that I am scared is not a good one.  So I want to know what you think.

For those of you who have not been with me since I started this blog, I began this blog because I love to write. And I typically have a story to tell on any given day because life is just funny.  But one of the most impacting, dramatically life changing events of my life was going through infertility and having both my girls come to be our daughters. It is my 2 Shades of Pink Story.

And I wrote 8 posts about this amazing and painful time in my life.  I wrote all of it so God could receive all the glory. I know some of you may have read it but those of you who have not, would you consider reading it and telling me if you believe it can be published?

I know all of you are not editors of some publishing company but it would mean so much to me.  I believe this story can touch many hearts regarding infertility, fostering/adopting children, and most of all about a God who can do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine.

The title that keeps niggling at me is like this blog but it is He Colored my World Two Shades of Pink.

I have taken all 8 posts and put it on a page at the top of the blog.  By no means is it in manuscript form!  I just pasted it in there so it is easier to read.  I am also not sure if many people know I went through infertility to become blessed with my girls. But I want you to know now.

Will you read it and let me know what you think?

It is long and may take a big ol' long while. Go get a snack and something to drink before you do it. But let me know if you think this story needs to be seen in a book some day.

I would love to hear your thoughts.  Be gentle.

Two Tips Tuesday

Another Guest Blogger! 
And she is getting crafty!  I have to tell you this guest blogger is one of my favorites and I have been with her since she started her wonderful blog.  Meet Tammy from she wears flowers.  Every single time I peek in on her blog I am mesmerized at her creativity   She is one crafty lady, so sweet, and a mommy of 3 girls which endears her to my heart even more.  What is even more special is that we have developed a friendship outside our blogs with email.  It warms my heart that I can call Tammy a friend and even more so to introduce you to her and her wonderful creativity.

First of all, let me just say, I am giddy with excitement to be a guest blogger on Two Shades of Pink. Besides the fact that I am completely captivated by her blog, I was ecstatic that Jessica actually wanted my tips. When I volunteered, I feared she would politely put me off, but she didn't. Maybe it was desperation, but I am still ecstatic!
 
I am Tammy and I am a relatively new blogger. I like to blog about my crafts and my sewing projects because it helps me organize and balance what I am doing, what I should be doing and what I want to be doing! I spend a lot of time sewing for my three daughters and, recently, finally getting in gear to open my Etsy shop (this week--YAY!). I like other crafts, too, so I try to cover all of my creative bases at one point or another.
 
Tip #1
When I read Jessica's tip a couple of weeks ago about felt and fabric rings using covered buttons, the wheels in my brain just started spinning. I LOVE covered buttons--and, actually, the ones I love are the ones in the kit that she mentioned in her post she didn't want to use. But, that's okay. I knew just what I wanted to do with some covered buttons that have a shank on the back like the ones in the kits. A few supplies later this is where I ended up.

 

This little bracelet is easy to make and quick. I like quick and, if you read my blog, you know I am a big fan of easy, too. I got all of my supplies from Hobby Lobby or JoAnn's.

Supplies:

 

Easy Clasp Bracelets, Button Covering Kit, Fray Check

Scraps of Fabric

Needle and thread

Instructions:

Start by covering your buttons according to the package directions.

 

Next, you will make fabric yo-yo's to layer under your buttons. You will need a fabric circle that is roughly 4 times larger than your button. You will probably have to experiment a time or two with the size by scrunching it together. Once you decide on the right size, cut the same number of squares of fabric as the number of buttons you have covered.

Here's a quick way to turn your square in into a circle or circle-ish shape:

 

Next, stitch around your circle. You want to "skip stitches" so that you can pull the threads and gather the fabric up. Stitch close to the edge being careful not to go off of it. You can also use your sewing machine to do this, but I know Jessica is not friends with hers (yet!) so I thought I should respect that.

 

Pull the threads tightly and carefully so they do not break. When you have a tiny fabric "purse" tie the threads in a knot and trim ends close to the knot.

 

Gently adjust and flatten the tiny purse until it looks like a flower.

 

Hold the flower by the gathering stitches, turn it over, and snip a tiny hole in the back. Put a few drops of Fray-Check on the edges of the hole so your flower doesn't fray later. Let dry completely--maybe 15 minutes.

 

Push the shank of your button through the center of your gathered stitches and out the hole you snipped. Thread the button and flower through your bracelet. Repeat until you have the number of buttons you want. There you go. Don't you love it?

 

 

You can do so much with these little "flowers". I got so excited about these, that I made a hair accessory, too. You can see that at my blog, she wears flowers. 

Tip #2

Nothing says spring to me like pinwheels. (You know, it's the whole "In/out like a lamb and in/out like a lion thing.") This year, I thought I would make my very own. It was really hard to choose which papers to use so I tried a few combinations.

Supplies:

Two-sided paper

Spray adhesive

paper cutter

ruler

small hole puncher or eyelet setting tool (optional)

jumbo brads

hot glue gun

medium wire wreath

felt scraps

spray paint (optional)

Remove the outer loop of your wire wreath. Mine broke off easily, but the next two loops did not and I had to use wire cutters to remove those. Spray paint your wreath the same color or a similar color as your door color. This way, your pinwheels will look as if they are suspended in a circle rather than on a wreath. Let dry while you make your pinwheels. (And, no, I didn't paint mine because I was too lazy it was already really close to the color of my door.)

This is the type of wreath you need:

 

Using your paper cutter to cut as accurately as possible, cut seven 5-inch squares of your main design. Repeat for the secondary design. Using spray adhesive, which will allow your paper to stay flexible still, glue together so you have 7 two-sided 5 inch squares. Trim any excess if necessary.

 

Make one 5 inch square out of scrap paper to use as a template. Draw a diagonal line from one corner to the opposite corner. Measure 2 1/2 inches from the corner along this line and make a mark. Repeat for the opposite corners.

 

Using your small hole punch or an eyelet setting tool (or even a sharp pencil if you are careful)--I'll just call it your "hole-making tool", poke holes through the marks you just made. When you are done, it should look like this:

 

Next, mark your two-sided paper using the template. I made very small and very light marks on the "main" design, but I am showing the secondary design (just a solid yellow) because it shows up better.

 

Cut diagonally from each corner towards the center until you reach the mark. Be sure to cut as straight as possible so your edges look clean and sharp.

 

Punch a hole in the center where you already marked it. Punch holes around the corners--every other triangle point--being certain that you only punch each large triangle once.

 

Put the jumbo brad through the first hole in one corner. Start on the side that is your primary color and push through to the side that is your secondary color. Gently bend the corner with the brad in it towards the center of your square. Be careful you do not fold/crease your paper. 

 

Turning your pinwheel, bend the next corner towards the center and push the brad through it as well. Do the same with the other two corners. Finally, push the brad through the hole in the center and flatten it out at the back of your pinwheel.

Repeat for the rest of your squares.

Glue a ribbon hanger onto your wire first.

 

Glue your first pinwheel to the hanging ribbon. I used low heat glue so that it didn't harden and cool as quickly. I also set my pinwheels around the outside of the wire so I knew where I wanted each one and which direction I wanted to turn it. I didn't want them to be too uniform, but they kind of came out that way anyhow since the pinwheels themselves are already uniform.

Cut 7 one inch felt squares. Hot glue generously in the center of the felt. Quickly glue the felt to the back of the wire and press the pinwheel to it from the front. Because there is a little dip in the center back of the pinwheel, it will not glue easily to the wire without the felt on the other side. This is what it looked like from the bottom, but you do not have to turn it over to do the gluing.

 

 

Hang your wreath and then make some more. 

 

Like I said, it was difficult for me to choose my colors. I couldn't decide between bright and cheerful spring or flowery, soft spring. As I started making these, it occurred to me that they could easily be made out of fabric as well. You can go to my blog  to see what I turned my fabric pinwheels into.

This is also a great craft for older children to do by themselves. My daughters loved making the pinwheels although they had no interest in the crafts made out of pinwheels. Here are some more ideas for paper ones. And, just so you know, all of these crafts were made in one afternoon--they really are quick.

So Fun! I am putting both of these on my craft To DO list!

Happy Tuesday Friends!

You Know What Goes Well With Disappointment?

Ice Cream.

Yep.  As I sit here and peck away at these keys I have some slow churned Edy's sitting here melting onto my desk. Actually it is melting on to this printed out MLS listing for this house we put an offer on.  I even opened some M&M's and poured them right on in to this here carton. And boy does it taste good. I believe this carton of ice cream here is the buffer needed to prevent disappointment from sliding into depression. I may get fatter but at least I will be happier on my journey there.

I thought long and hard about this post because I really was worried that I would seem faithless after being told a big, fat, meany, NO on the house and becoming so sad about it. Wait, maybe I should back up and tell you what happened.  As many of you figured out, I type like I think and like I talk.  Backing up...

Today we countered again and they said no even in the phone call. Which kinda stinks because we asked them on Saturday if we offered a certain number, would they consider it.  They said for us to get it in writing, we did, and they say an immediate no.  Huh. Well, God has spoken.  I am just sad we wasted a weekend.  

Oh that's right.  We had our faces in the toilet and so did our poor realtor.  Never mind.  No time wasted.

But back to my thoughts on posting about this.  I suppose I wanted to come at you with this super duper, spiritual-giant-like thing to say to show you how faithful I am.  And holy with a capital H. But then I realized I can be so dogmatic in how I think that being sad is somehow wrong, or faithless, or even sinful.  

All baloney.

One thing I know is that  I endeavor to be a Christian who is honest about the stuff of life. And I have to say I am so sad this house did not work out.  Sure, I can hope the deal falls through and they come back to us.  I can hope that a bigger and better house would be closer to Cati's school or my husband's work to shorten his commute. 

But in all of it I know that God said no and I truly rest in that no.  But here is what I am not resting in...His ultimate answer.  No is fine and often we hear the platitudes that God has something better...I even say that.  But here are my questions messaged into the Kingdom  today... 

What if His better is not My better?  

What if my wants have become ideals? 

What if what God has is something I need to have a thankful heart about instead of crying out about what is "right" for us in my own eyes?  

I often find I can start praying AT God like I am offering up a memo and then console myself that God got Jessica's memo.  Miss Churchy Smartpants USA with the sash to prove it has given God the memo about His will and her wants. When we put them alllll together they create the pot of gold at the end of my psycho rainbow.

How disillusioned can I be and how insulting is that to my King? 

I am not saying I have done that with this particular house but I am wondering if I am at a spiritual place where I know the right things to say yet I am really not being honest with God. Truly baring my heart to the God who knows it all anyway.  I used to pray brutally honest things like:

God, this woman annoys me.  And I don't love her at all. Her perfume is appalling and she seems to think being a know it all is attractive to other people.  Please help me to love her.  I want to please you yet talking to this person is so unpleasant that I believe my flesh will take the driver's seat and give her what for.  The joy of the Lord is my strength. Amen.

or

Lord God in Heaven.  I know I prayed for these children.  I know that you put us on a glorious journey of faith to place them in our lives.  But why don't you prepare us for things like when my oldest will take a shoe string out of a shoe and proceed to create an intricate noose leash with it pretending her little sister is her pet dog? I love them Lord but it truly is by your grace that they made it to their bedtimes alive.

This is honesty with God who knows our frail humanity is so limited.  But I find myself in a strange place when I say the "right" things to God in prayer.

Your will not mine, God. 

When I really want to say,

"I WANT THAT HOUSE EVEN IF IT ISN'T YOUR WILL!" 

Like if I really say the truth in my heart, HE will punish me for my selfish, wicked wants.  I know this is not true.  I KNOW IT.  But this is how I think and behave,  It is like there is a disconnect between my knowledge and the wisdom that lives out that knowledge.  Strange. Yet I also know when I truly confess my heart's desire that happens to not align with God's, He is so merciful because I always find my way back to wanting His will and not my own.

But today I am being real. I prayed that I wanted this house so much but that if it came back a no, I am believing God for his protection, provision, and ultimate plan for us.

But I am still so, so, so sad. 

And the ice cream is gone.  Which is fine because I am a little mad at it too.  I feel sick. I am so thinking God is teaching me something here. But anyways.  Back to the house search.

I am a little bit wiser.  A little less idealisitic.  And probably 3 pounds heavier.

I Think Presents in the Mail are the Best Kind.

Seriously, how much do I love presents? 

They make me so happy and probably more so than they should.  I even try to manipulate ways to get more.  For example, my birthday is June 25th.  EXACTLY 6 months from Christmas Day. Which makes Christmas my half birthday. Each and every year I think I argue an excellent point that this momentous occasion requires a bonus gift.  In all my thirty-mmmmthhbb  years, I have never, EVER gotten this bonus gift. This is just plain wrong.

But I just got the most fabulous gift the other day from a dear friend I have met out here in blogland.  I just love her, her genuine faith, and her transparent vulnerability.  But what drew me in initially?  Like a moth to the proverbial flame?  

She makes handbags.

I tell you, there is nothing more endorphin releasing for me than a new handbag.  And I have a wide range of tastes.  I like designer bags all the way down to those cute little handmade totes used at the grocery store. I love anything that is useful and beautiful all at the same time.  It is just too much goodness to behold when beauty is put to use.  And what better example than a handbag?

When I first visited Prudence at A Vintage Mom, I saw her first Lollibag. She uses vintage materials and her amazing skills to produce these lovelies. And I was so taken with them that I instantly became a follower with a comment that went something like, "You had me at 'I make handbags.'"

So the other day I left another comment drooling all over another one of her creations and she wrote me to tell me she was sending me one and to pick whatever one I liked.  As a gift.  Just because.

I chic squealed at my computer screen and then we proceeded to have an email marathon because I could not choose.  Choice is difficult for me and apparently it is for Prudence.  We decided going out to eat together would never work because we still would be deciding on our food as they lock the doors.

This is the one I finally chose which I received while down and out with sickness in my bed:

 

 

Oh, such glorious, ruffle-y, feminine, vintage, fabulousness all smooshed together in this beautiful handbag.

I sigh in blissful content.

So Prudy girl.  Know that your thoughtful gift is treasured so much.

Oh and know this.  I am plugging her because I WANT TO.  She just did this out of the kindness of her heart but I can't let  you miss out on meeting her.

Go visit Miss Talented Prudence here or check out her Etsy shop, lollipookiesoap chock full of other beautiful things too.

Here are ones that I love...

 

 These colors make me so happy.

 

Another great lollibag.  The ric-rac and red dot ribbon give this one such character.

 

Check out these fun zippers!  I have seen so many zipper flowers and things out there but this is just too fun! Edgy and sweet all at the same time. 

  

 (I think this lollibag may be my next purchase.  This is soooo me!)

 

 So pretty and fun.

Another happy necklace.

There are so many more but check them out for yourself. 

Now I am going to go put stuff in my new bag and pretend I am going somewhere.  Which I am not, with me now deeming this home "THE HOUSE OF THE ILL."

My poor baby girl got it today.  At least she is last.

Have a great day, friends!

Sigh.

Weeeellllll...it does not look good.

They countered at a price we just can't afford.  We are going to go back with a last offer that puts a bit out on a limb but we know we can do it.  We will just be tight for a little while. 

I am actually surprised I am not lying in a heap all depressed.  I think I really am truly trusting God with this one.  His "no" in this seems so reassuring.  Like, He is whispering, "Wait, beloved.  I have something for you but wait on me."

It may mean this house or another one.  Who knows?  He does.

I promise to keep you posted and please do not stop praying.  You are wonderful friends.

I am off to comfort and care for my husband who has caught this nasty little bug and it has hit him the hardest.  He is so weak and he can't stop throwing up.  Pray for him too!  Just pray us up all over the place!

Oh, here is a pic of the house you were praying for...isn't it cute? Oh well. 

Hugs to you all for being so thoughtful and sweet!

I Did NOT mean to be Literal!

About the throwing up thing. I was just kidding.

But perhaps the Spirit of God was moving within me to declare a warning.  A warning that I would find myself at 1 am in the bathroom with a trash can in my lap, and...ahem...performing other most uncomfortable evacuations.

Ugh!

I even sustained a hurling back injury! Is there such a thing?  My amazing husband took the day off to take care of me and good thing because Cati started throwing up by mid-morning.  I have read so many of your blogs and it seems there are MANY of you dealing with this as it cycles through your family.  

But the best part about it is I was so uncomfortable that I was unable to obsess about whether or not our offer was going to be accepted.  We were too busy cleaning couch cushions and clothes because of poor Cati. And it is now 4:15 pm and we still have not heard anything.  So as I type these words I don't have a clue what the answer is.

So I am going to push this handy dandy save button and wait until I hear the final answer...You are getting up to the minute info, friends...how fun!

UPDATE: 8:52 pm.  We have heard nothing! This is torture!  Apparently, we won't find out until tomorrow.  We pray this is in our favor that they have needed time to mull it over.  DO NOT STOP PRAYING!

I will post tomorrow and let you know.  If I make it through the night.

Will it be Yes or No?

All righty.

The ball has been set in motion. (Is there any oxygen in this room?)

Signed a contract offer tonight, wrote a scary check, and by 5 pm tomorrow we will know if our offer is accepted.

I am off to throw up.