I am incredibly blessed to be a mother to these two girls...
My Two Shades of Pink.But I think this particular day holds special meaning for me since my journey to motherhood was a long and hard one. I remember I would skip church every Mother's Day because each time during church the pastor would have all the mothers stand up to be acknowledged and clapped for.
Oh, how I would ache to stand with all of these women. I wanted desperately to call a child my own and finally have the title of...Mommy.
I would imagine the first time I would whisper those words to my baby..."Mommy loves you...Mommy's here." Or the first time I would hear a child call me "Mama." And that child would give me the greatest gift because that title would be reserved for only me.
And as I spent a lovely day with my daughters who made me berry pancakes that were slightly undercooked, where I smiled and told them they were the best pancakes I ever tasted, I could not help but think about this day that may bring sorrow for some women. Women who I can relate to in ways that bond me to them instantly. Who feel a yearning so deep, so personal, so raw...that it brings emotions to the fore that they did not even know existed.
These are mother's who are waiting or aching for their children.
Their journey's are all unique and all their own. Some are wading through the deep and sometimes murky waters of infertility. They are passionately seeking every opportunity to conceive a child. A hope for a tiny little life to grow inside them.
Some are waiting for a child to adopt who has grown in their heart. Who has been prayed for, thought about, and intensely wanted. They may live in another country and their only connection is paperwork that is worn from reading over and over and a photo that is bittersweet to gaze upon since a "what if" may hang over it.
Or perhaps a child is a foster child, living in their homes, in their arms, yet the certainty of adoption still far off. They love this child day in and day out yet not know if this will be the child to call their own. Or foster parents who open their hearts and homes to children they know will one day leave. To a better place. Or a worse one.
Or a mother who has lost a child. Who's heart is never fully whole again because the loss is so devastating and life altering. That not just on Mother's Day but daily they live with missing a child they can no longer hold or watch grow up to fulfill their dreams.
Today I am thinking and praying for you. Since I understand your pain acutely. My story is unique and all my own. And so is yours. But I feel a kinship and a sisterhood to these women where today may not be as joyful and easy. I have never forgotten my journey nor grown less sensitive to what it feels like to be a mother aching for a child...in whatever form it takes.
So as much as I celebrate being a mom to my precious girls...I also want to say I am thinking of you courageous, wonderful women. My heart is filled with love and prayer for you.
And at this moment I am standing up to recognize YOU.
So much love and hugs to all of you!