Dear Sweet Friends,
As many of you know, I have a very tender heart for so many women on Mother's Day. I wish many of you a happy one as you cherish those precious blessings in your life.
My own day started so sweet as I opened hand picked gifts from both my girls. They each got me gum, picked out precious cards and wrote in their endearingly sweet handwriting of a child. They drew me beautiful pictures that I look at with a heart that swells with a love I did not know possible.
My oldest picked out a hot pink cell phone case for me knowing mine was broken. And my youngest got me a hot pink set of tools. I know I will be a smiling fool whacking at some nails with that delicious pink hammer some day soon. Those girls are so precious. They even picked out flip flops for me. Ella chose green (her favorite color) and Cati chose pink (her favorite color). When I got dressed for the day, I could not choose which ones to wear.
So I wore both. ♥
Who knew what a mother's heart will do for her precious babies? People looked at my feet and then at me like I was a complete nut but so be it. I am nuts...about my girls!
But my heart typically focuses on many women whose pain was great today. For many years, this day brought me pain as I ached for a baby. As I prayed year after year to be called that beautiful name that would belong only to me from my own precious child...Mommy. This day was one where I would wish the hours away, avert my eyes from the the bouquets of flowers being bought or received, or sadly witness happy families with the mother (yet again) bursting with child as they ushered their other children here and there. Sitting with pain and an odd sense of shame as mother's were asked to stand in church to be honored for their so coveted role and title.
It was typically a dark day year after year.
So today is the day I stand up for women who I share a bond with for always. Where this day brings pain, grief, and maybe even anger. Because I have walked in your pain. And carry a bit with me now so I will never forget my journey. Or your fragile heart as you courageously work out these emotions in your heart.
To you...
Women (and men) who have lost their mother in death.
Mother's who have lost a child to death or miscarriage.
Mother's who are not yet mother's because they are waiting for God to bless them by conceiving yet in their hearts they are a mother already without a baby to hold.
Mother's who anxiously wait to adopt and still have not wrapped their arms around their babies and ache for them to be home soon.
Mother's who have courageously given their children up for adoption knowing they will have a better life.
Mother's who may be estranged from their children or vice versa due to past hurts and mistakes.
For you I stand because I have a special place in my heart for you.
Today I prayed for you all day.
Loving you without knowing your name and seeing your precious face. But knowing you are there. Praying that this day will somehow bring you peace and a knowing of God's perfect love.
My daughter's birth mother was on my mind a lot too.
Does she miss her? Is her heart full of regret?
I know she has other children she has lost too. Sadly, due to poor choices.
Does she feel like a childless mother? Does she know that her ultimate, sacrficial decision allowed me to gain that glorious name...that her birth child made ME a mother? Does she know?
So I prayed.
For her and each and every one of you.
With more love in my heart then you may ever even know.
And I stand for you this day letting you know that a person you have never met...honored YOU.
Lots of love and blessings,
Jessica