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March 11, 2010

He Colored My World...

I am actually shaking as I type this because I am so nervous to do this.

But I need your advice.  All of you who read this. Yes, YOU!  And I just reached over 200 followers (Yay!  How fun because I am grateful for every one of you) and what better time to re-introduce you to my special story.  But I have to tell you that I am so fearful of failure that it can sometimes paralyze me.  And I have toyed around with an idea that I am scared is not a good one.  So I want to know what you think.

For those of you who have not been with me since I started this blog, I began this blog because I love to write. And I typically have a story to tell on any given day because life is just funny.  But one of the most impacting, dramatically life changing events of my life was going through infertility and having both my girls come to be our daughters. It is my 2 Shades of Pink Story.

And I wrote 8 posts about this amazing and painful time in my life.  I wrote all of it so God could receive all the glory. I know some of you may have read it but those of you who have not, would you consider reading it and telling me if you believe it can be published?

I know all of you are not editors of some publishing company but it would mean so much to me.  I believe this story can touch many hearts regarding infertility, fostering/adopting children, and most of all about a God who can do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine.

The title that keeps niggling at me is like this blog but it is He Colored my World Two Shades of Pink.

I have taken all 8 posts and put it on a page at the top of the blog.  By no means is it in manuscript form!  I just pasted it in there so it is easier to read.  I am also not sure if many people know I went through infertility to become blessed with my girls. But I want you to know now.

Will you read it and let me know what you think?

It is long and may take a big ol' long while. Go get a snack and something to drink before you do it. But let me know if you think this story needs to be seen in a book some day.

I would love to hear your thoughts.  Be gentle.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. I love your story. :) I think you tell it with genuine sincerity. I'm an English teacher, so you should know I think it's well written, too!

    * I had a typo at first--I had to delete my comment to get rid of that typo. Ha ha :)

  3. I just read your whole story and I cried like a baby! I am still wiping away tears. It is amazing, and I can't imagine going through something like that. What hope it gives me! God is amazing and I love to hear how he works in people's lives. Your faith through it all inspires me to not give up on things I long for in my own life and reminds me that with God all things are possible. Thank you for sharing that and I def. think this needs to be a book!!

  4. So both my girls are sleeping so I had time to read your story. What a blessing, and I have tears rolling down my face! ha. And as the pp person said, your faith inspire me to belive! And I think this could be a great book to share with others in the future!!
    It's a beautiful thing that you shared with us!
    Your daughter's are soooo cute!
    And yaaay for over 200 followers! ;)

  5. Just found you what I see so far..but will have to come back and read your story and then I will let you know what I think..
    Good luck

  6. I will read it tomorrow, with a box of kleenex, if it is anything like your normally are, ya go ahead and publish it. My motto is: better to have tried and failed then never to have tried at all.... and I have tried it all! You can do this!

  7. Yes, YES, YES! I am not sure I have read it in it's entirety. One night I read most of it, but I was crying too hard and remembering so much that I had to stop reading for a while. I don't think I ever read every single part. But, I will go back and do that and would love a book. LOVE!

    Of all people to write about this, YOU are the one!!! I have been there and I totally get this, but I could never write like you do. Please do it--for yourself, for me, and for everyone who struggles with infertility and faith.

  8. I love your style of writing and humor. I read your story and even though I know nothing personally of the struggles of infertility, I felt your pain and was inspired by how you simply trusted God the entire time. The world needs more writers who will give the glory to Jesus. I think you should go for it. :)

    (p.s. That title is so cute!)

  9. Totally! There are many women who would be touched by your story. I think most of us grow up assuming that having a family is just something you it must be easy. Those of us who find the journey difficult are shocked by the discovery of just how hard it can be. I don't think it's talked about openly and widely enough 'out there' in society. From my perspective as someone who suffered several miscarriages, most of the 'general public' (we're talking even friends here) expected me to just 'get over it' and didn't understand that I needed to go through a real grieving process for the death of my children.
    Go, girl! Awesome that you have the courage to put it out there!

  10. I'm totally planning on reading it tonight after I get the kid and husband to bed and I have some quiet time to devote to it. Your post comes at a very interesting time in my own life and I have thought about contacting you to get a better idea about adoption. So I'll read and then I'll comment more and perhaps even shoot you an email!

  11. I didn't go back and read it, but when I joined a while back I read it. I have this odd compulsion (I suppose that's the word) to start any new blog at the very beginning. I can't just jump in. When I started Big Mama and Bring the Rain, it took FOREVER to get to the current posts! Point is, when I joined here I started at the beginning and read it all and cried and yes, yes you should get it published!

  12. Oh my goodness PRAISE THE LORD FROM WHOM ALL BLESSINGS FLOW. I looked at how long it was and thought I should read it tomorrow and just go to bed, but I could not help myself. I just sat here and read the whole thing and just WOW. I think your story is amazing and the way you tell it is so captivating. I have not walked the infertility path nor dealt with foster care or adoption, but I think this story is such a blessing REGARDLESS. God is faithful. God is good. "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Just AWESOME. Thank you for inviting those of us who are newer to your blog into that part of your journey.

  13. Jessica,

    Before I became a full time mommy (which was a surprise to me :), I was an English teacher. I think your writing is excellent, readable, and most of all a little unconventional. I know nothing about the publishing world, other than it seems to be a big scary place. I have submitted a children's story manuscript to a few agents as a very beginning process, and so I have been excited to receive several rejection letters so far. (Excited because these people really do exist...and the publishing world all seems kind of fairy tale like to me :) Anyway, I don't know what genre your story would fall into, but I do know that I was interested in reading it, even though I had (please don't hate me) a surprise pregnancy when I wasn't trying. (I ONLY say this to say that people who aren't struggling with infertility still can be your audience). I do have a friend who has adopted, a friend who has PCOS and is now 11 weeks pregnant, and a friend who desperately wants a baby, has been trying, and just suffered a very early miscarriage, and a friend with a 6 month old who was told she was infertile. I guess what I'm saying is every mom has a story...from the unexpected pregnancy to the triumphant pregnancy, and as mothers, we are bonded through the similarities of our stories, and we develop compassion and understanding through the differences. If you have a dream to publish your story, do your research, write, write and rewrite...all focusing on the strengths of your amazing voice, your complete unashamed honesty, and the little bit of unconventional that makes your writing completely your own, and then let us know when we can go buy this book!!! Happy writing!

  14. I can't wait to see your story in print. And in the process, I'm here to help!!! Let me know what I can do to encourage you to follow God's perfect plan for your (HIS) story!! Thank you for being so willing to share it. He's using you every time you tell it. Every time someone new reads it. Every time. To God be the glory!

  15. Jessica,
    I just read your whole story because my friend Kristy (2 comments above me) thought I should. And I'm so glad I did. I would totally buy your book!
    (And FYI Kristy's a great proofreader-just ask my husband, she would read his college papers at 2 in the morning......she even puts up with procrastinators!)
    Thank you for sharing your story with the blog world, I am thankful for your openness (is that even a word) and ability to tell your story.


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